Heaves of Gas

I hear a dissonant theme like a jab in the head

and I am a little bit rusty

and my scales don’t flow smoothly

but my groove is growing in me

I want another hour

another day

another week

I want another lover to ruin me hereafter

I want another god

a new promise of a better future

I want another rhythm

and this rhyme gets better now that I’m older ( but non the wiser)

I wish I’d crumble so my craft would get sharper

laugh at my idealistic hogwash frenemies

and say I am a walking disaster

because

this anger

bolder stronger deeper darker

is all what the world promised to offer

that I may be

healed

renewed and

finally silenced

dancing to the tune of earths subtle spin

oh blindly fueled rage

this shadowboxer buried six-feet under

rears its ugly head and sees

for the first time in 26 years

that the world is multi-colored

and now that I am done off to the next chapter

--- Heaves of Gas of what would’ve been “Leaves of Grass”

Oh the Bane of Knowing Too Much About You.

Mater Dolorosa

Mater Dolorosa

Naked and trembling
You gave in to his romances
As he carelessly pats you like a dog
And fondles you
This is the kind of calm you succumb to
At midnight after being hurled, harangued and harassed
Of tossing about in the kitchen
A slave at home and in bed
Now you resign to take a cool slumber, sobbing
He then plants a kiss to where it suffers a livid burn
From his brutal grip,
Cooed I love you
then yawned.
To think you almost believed it.
Fascists,
they know not how
To touch a heart
Save by wounding it.
January 15, 2009